All divorces present their own challenges, but some are particularly bitter and contentious. When this happens, it makes the divorce even harder and more stressful for everyone going through it. For many people, it may seem as though there is nothing they can do to make the process easier, but that is not true. If you are going through a high-conflict divorce, below are four strategies that can help you get through it.
Limit Communication to Once a Day
Sometimes, divorces involve a lot of conflicts because one party simply likes to be angry. They may call, email, or text their spouse to argue with them constantly. When this happens, it is important to remember that you are under no obligation to respond, unless there are children involved and it is an emergency situation. If your spouse is contacting you all the time just to argue, wait 24 hours to respond. When you do so, respond to all messages your spouse has sent you in the past day.
Do Not See Your Spouse During Visitation Drop-Offs
If you or your partner has been awarded child custody, even temporarily, you may think you have to see your spouse when dropping off your child or picking them up. Arguments often arise during these drop-offs and pickups because it is often difficult for couples going through a divorce to see each other without becoming angry. Instead, arrange to drop children off or pick them up at the curb, or arrange to go to the child’s school to pick them up.
Do Not Attend Events Together
Again, if you have to see your spouse and you know there is already a lot of conflict between you, seeing each other will likely only make it worse. It can be difficult to not attend your child’s birthday party or school play, but you should make arrangements for you and your spouse to attend these events separately. Have a separate birthday party for your child, ask teachers to meet with each of you separately for parent/teacher conferences, and alternate times when you will watch your children participate in their extracurricular activities.
Focus on What You Can Control
Trying to change someone’s behavior is an exercise in futility. When your spouse tries to argue with you, understand that you cannot do anything about their actions, and do your best to ignore them. Instead, focus on more important things, such as your children, your friends and family, and protecting your rights during the divorce.
Our Michigan Family Lawyers can Help With Your High-Conflict Divorce
All divorces are challenging, but high-conflict cases make the process even more difficult. In these situations, it is even more important that you speak to a Clinton Township family lawyer who can help. At Iafrate & Salassa, P.C., we can help you diffuse high-conflict situations and bring neutrality to the table. We will also act as your advocate and ensure that your rights are upheld. If you are going through a divorce, call us today or contact us online to schedule a free consultation.